Damn their hides! No space for vulvar anatomy? I’ve found space even on racing schedules, but I’ve been behind enough one-way glass watching OB/GNs in quantitative research. They all agree “there’s not much to see,” which I disagree with entirely. I’ve stared at them for hours despite angry hands banging me on the back of the head. And, yes, I know women like dick pics, but I think it’s more of a giggle. Many look like someone forgot to tie off the end of a sausage tube, while others look like beacons in the night. Not nearly as interesting or romantic as “the little man in the boat.”

I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.