If you read the whole piece, Austin, you would have seen that it’s satire, meaning you shouldn’t be taking me seriously. However, since you’re a gun enthusiast, and you think I’m demonizing “a pretty popular group,” I’ll try to be serious. What I point out are the interesting—and often ludicrous—comments made by others. Am I trying to be balanced? Not really. I’m more interested in highlighting the hyperbole coming out of peoples’ lips these days. Anyone who isn’t at least mildly confused, irritated, or possibly aghast at the ridiculousness of 30,000 gun-related deaths being “the cost of freedom” truly needs to travel more. In terms of my piece being “fairly common,” it might be because more people are seeing numbers like “30,000 gun-related deaths” as absolutely bizarre. If these numbers aren’t bizarre to you, again, travel more.

I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.