Sarah Silverman solved the problem by shoving her phone down her shorts. Seems the more calls you get, the more orgasms you get. Very clever woman, that Sarah Silverman. Our addiction to technology obviously has to be cured in creative ways. You tried timers, that just showed you recognized your addition. The real trick is to use technology the way God intended: Shove that phone down your shorts. Hold it against your wife’s nipples. Then just hope you’re as popular as you think. If you’re really that popular, the phone will do its job.

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I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.

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