Thanks for your comment, Jessica. Having spent 25 years in medical writing, I’m always interested in clinical research, particularly out of facilities like Rattlesnake, Texas (real or imaged). MRI studies on cliteral vascular engorgement with various stimuli is fascinating territory. What was the size of the sample group? Was the background music consistent with all age groups, or tailored to each? I can’t imagine millennials being turned on by Grover Washington Jr., for instance, or a spread-eagled octogenarian getting off to Li’l Wayne (or maybe they would). Please provide p-values and duration of study, plus percentage of squirters (so I know it isn’t my imagination, since my girlfriend says it’s more common than you think, and I believe she just likes wetting the bed while she reads Sarah Silverman). Also, please list the stimuli in order of patient preference and who stole what from the facility. Thanks.

I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.