That man really doesn’t exist, Jessica. Men respect men who play pussy-whipped and get a Miata. I know these men. The ones who really are puss-whipped aren’t respected. They’re what we call the “doggy treats” variety. They clean the kitchen to hear “Nice job, Glen.” The men and women we really respect find equilibrium, meaning both sides “give and get.” When I ask women here what they give for all that “chivalry,” and they say, “Oh, I give positive affirmation left and right,” well that’s great, but it sounds like a lot of head-patting. My dog loved head-patting, but if it didn’t come with a treat now and then, she got morose. Cocker spaniels look terrible morose. Check out the men on the subway some day. See how many look like morose cocker spaniels. That’s the whole story right there.

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I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.

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