You succeeded because you failed enough times to realize failure can hang around as long as you can. Breaking the “failure cycle” requires marriage. We all think it occurs before marriage, but it doesn’t. Marriage exists to remind us shy, introverts types that if we can’t run away, we have to move to Plan B. Plan B is what we’ve avoided since we first became interested in girls. Plan B is accepting that we’re imperfect, and it’s possible two imperfect people together is no worse—or better—than one imperfect person alone. I call it “The Duality of Dunces.” It’s no different than public speaking. We avoid it like the plague. The day we finally have to speak in public, we agonize, we figure everyone will hate us—but they don’t. They’re impressed we’re up there talking. Marriage is the same. It’s everyone around you realizing you’re actually loveable. I got married in my forties just to prove I’m loveable. I got divorced three years later to show she wasn’t loveable. You lucked out, my friend. Enjoy the longevity of lovableness.

Written by

I did a poor imitation of Don Draper for 40 years before writing my first novel. I'm currently in the final stages of a children's book. Lucky me.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store